Dating a Thinner Man

I’ve always thought I’ll marry a chubby man who shares my love for food. On hindsight, it was probably to make myself feel better about my body.

But as fate would have it, I’m dating a man who is thinner than me.

I weigh 60kg. When I met my boyfriend, he was about 52kg.

Now, after I’ve committed myself to losing weight, and him to gain bulk,

I still weigh 60kg, and he’s progressed to about 55-56kg.

The first time I met his family, I was struck at how slim the women in his family was. His mother was petite, his sister was model-gorgeous even in a tee-shirt and shorts. And even though they were absolutely welcoming, I cannot help but think that they must be disappointed to see their son date someone bigger.

I’ve always been very conscious about my weight standing beside him. Contrary to me, he is very health conscious, he has great discipline and self-control. He stops himself from indulging in high-fat food most of the time while I give in to temptation most of the time. He exercises whenever he can, while I on the other hand have a thousand and one excuses to convince myself not to exercise. I love food, and I am at times, an emotional eater.  I reward myself for hard day at work by eating, I eat when I’m stressed, when I’m sad, I even celebrate successes at dieting or exercise with great food. Though I've made much improvement over the years, I still seem to lack the motivation to push myself a bit more and commit to my weight loss plans.

My boyfriend has always been oblivious to my size. He always tells me he loves me for who I am, and has never used my weight against me or told me I needed to lose weight. His only concern was my health, because gaining more weight would worsen my long-standing lower-back injury. When we first got intimate, I was afraid he’ll be turned off when he sees the rolls of fats on my body.  But the way he kisses every inch of my body makes me feel beautiful every time.  I cannot be more thankful for a man who loves me for who I am. My boyfriend stood by me through all my failed attempts at losing weight. I seem to come up with new plans to lose weight every other week, because my previous plans have failed. It must be really frustrating for him to see my lack of successes, but he has never flared up at me or scolded me for being lazy, as ill-disciplined, or determined enough in my weight loss efforts.  Indeed, he’ll probably never truly understand how it feels like to be fat, but he’s never looked down on me on my journey.

So thank you my love. For never giving up on me.